![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
SILVER LINING: If he is clear for 5 years, he's considered cured. I am hopefully going to go see him and my brother Corey in a couple months.
2) My brother-in-law's mother was diagnosed with kidney cancer which has spread to her lungs. She had surgery to remove the kidney yesterday. They won't know anything more for a few more days. -- this all happened in the past 2 weeks.
SILVER LINING: She is recovering and doing as well as can be expected.
3) I've been invited to go visit my Aunt Theresa and Grandma Pugh, along with some other ladies of the family for a fun ladies weekend on Easter weekend. The one problem - how am I going to tell my mother that I won't be here to celebrate Easter with her and my Grandma Straley (the one with alzheimers in assisted living), and instead I'm going to be spending Easter with my agnostic aunt and my Grandma who is considering Judaism at 85 yrs old. (My family is crazy and I love it.) I don't think there will be any going to Easter mass if I go up to D.C. :-P Scratch that...I don't think, I know there won't be. And I'm cool with that.
SILVER LINING: I get to see my Grandma Pugh and Aunt Theresa who I don't see very often, go to DC again which I love, hang out with the ladies of the family that I haven't spent much one on one time with like my father's cousins Becky and Laura. My Aunt is also offering to pay most of my way up there.
4) Just today I was invited by my mother and my Aunt Cathleen (mom's sis) to go visit my Aunt Cathleen in New Mexico next weekend. Aunt Cathleen's husband, my Uncle Woody, just passed away unexpectedly in January from a heart attack, so she can really use company right now. However, this will mean that I would be spending an entire weekend with my MOTHER...Ahhh!!! (We have not exactly been getting along lately.) AND, I will have to take Monday off of work with short notice. I have no idea what to decide and i have about 3 hours to make the decision.
SILVER LINING: I feel like this opportunity has been placed in my path for a reason. My mom and I would have time together out of town which may help us to mend a little bit - without the constraints and responsibilities of being in the area, etc. And, I do want to see my Aunt to help in anyway that I can and I wouldn't mind going to see New Mexico again.
5) I just found out yesterday that my team at work will be moving to a different building in Lewisville on 5/1. This means that I will have about 15 more minutes to drive to work. YAY! Oh, and it's right before the summer which means that gas will be going up. JOY!
SILVER LINING: My manager says that we may be able to work out a deal so I can work from home a couple days a week. SWEET!
- I still have a job that, although it may not be my dream job, let's me work from home when needed, is flexible when it comes to taking time off, gave me a freaking raise in this economy and actually praises me for my work. Also, it's the one big bank out there that is doing well...I had no idea when I applied last year that I was picking the right bank to work for. If I have to work for any bank (like I said, not my dream job) then I choose this one.
- My health - I feel great most of the time now, as long as I'm eating right. I have energy and don't get the brain fogginess anymore. During this time where my 31 year old brother gets cancer, I am just so happy to be healthy and need to remember to appreciate that!
- Shaun - He is more amazing than I ever knew before. It's crazy that after almost 6 years of knowing each other and being together, I constantly learn more and never want to stop learning. He helps to restore my belief in real love.
- Rock climbing - Shaun and I went rock climbing last weekend and it was a total freaking blast! I'd been about 8 years ago and had always wanted to go again. We have this awesome indoor rock-climbing gym really close by and we decided we are going to try going once every month or couple of months. Can you believe it? Us, rock climbing?! And you know what? We kicked ass. :-)
- Gluten-free food in the store - We had my Aunt Kathy and Uncle Steve over for dinner for the first time last week. Shaun made his fabulous sausage and peppers pasta meal and I was able to have pasta because I got gluten-free pasta! I've had that before but it was spaghetti and ended up being very mushy and crumbly. This time I got the little ones and they were awesome!
- My friends and spontaneity: Last Sunday we were planning to go to the Dallas Aquarium with Twiggy and at the last minute she called and said she heard we could get Stars tickets for like 20 bucks. We did it , we went to the game and it was AWESOME! They lost, but oh well! We had a blast! Thanks Twigs!
- FRIDAYS!!! And on that note, I'm going to get off the computer and go do fun stuff.
- Location:home
- Mood:
energetic - Music:Rage Against the Machine
I’ve been thinking about a couple more goals I ‘d like to put on my life list or resolution list…Running is one of them. I have always wished to run a half-marathon someday or at least a shorter race. I think I got turned off of running back in high school because I played soccer and part of our training was to run about 3 miles a day and then practice for an hour+ on top of that. That would go for about 4 months straight, granted we mixed up the workouts some. But, for someone who was definitely not a hard core workout person before that, I felt like I was being tortured sometimes. I ended up dropping off the soccer team my 2nd year, using the excuse that I had to work after school and wouldn’t be able to practice. That was true, but I think if I’d really loved it I could have found a way to stay in it. But, I was SO burned out and tired of being yelled at to run faster and farther, etc.
It didn’t help that I had some stomach issues that I didn’t understand back then which kept me from being the healthiest version of myself. I was always having stomach aches and couldn’t decide if I was going to barf or the other thing – and you can imagine how wonderful that feels when you are running forever in the Texas heat and everyone else seems to be just bouncing along. Back then, I didn’t know that my stomach issues were even issues…I thought that I just had a really sensitive stomach, couldn’t do anything about it and would just always have to live with it. Thank God that now, after years of dealing with these things, I have learned about Celiac Disease and the gluten-free diet and after changing my diet, have felt more physically normal than I have in years, if ever. So, now that I have that stuff more or less under control, I am finding myself much more interested in new activities or picking up activities I previously left by the wayside.
It’s really amazing to realize that the reason I was somewhat lazy and unmotivated when it came to getting out and doing things on a week night or even weekend is that I was always feeling somewhat sick to my stomach. I had dealt with it for so long that I was used to it and had gotten into the habit of planning for shorter bursts of activity – coming home. Shorter bursts – coming home. I always wanted to be near home or a bathroom. Anyway, I know this subject is just so lovely and anyone readying it is probably enthralled…but this is all leading to the fact that now I’m ready to consider running again.
A few great things did come from all that running and working out back in high school. My weight had always fluctuated from about 120-130 at 5’1” when I was about 15 years old. I eventually got slimmed down to about 113 lbs at my fittest during soccer, toned up, made friends, learned that I loved team sports and hardly ever got sick because I guess my immune system was being built up. Oh and I eventually got to about an 8 ½ minute mile…That isn’t very great compared to the more experienced runners, but for me that was great! I started out so out of shape at a 15 minute mile! So I’d cut off almost 7 minutes in a few months!
I really love to exercise as long as it’s at a normal pace. I do not enjoy being forced to do something to the point where I’m about the break and I refuse to do that unless it’s a life or death situation. You know, like all those times when I may have to run from the law…However, I want motivation and am too easy on myself when I don’t have something or someone motivating me. So, I’ve looked at some running groups in the area who meet on weeknights to go for a run on certain trails in Arlington. I’m certain that those runners are much more advanced than me and will probably leave me in the dust, but I have to start somewhere! I also found this website which promotes this beginner’s program called Couch-2-5K. It’s supposed to help beginners start off slow with running and slowly build up so that in about 8-9 weeks you can run 3 or more miles in 30 minutes. I’m going to see if I can get Shaun to start it with me. He definitely has no interest in running, but maybe if we start off slow he won’t think it’s so bad. I am really proud of him lately because he’s taken the initiative to go out to ride his bike on nice days. I can already tell he is slimming down and the best part is it’s all his idea. He is even the one motivating me to go most of the time. It’s a great way to hang out and get our hearts pumping together…apart from our other favorite way to get our hearts pumping together. Lol!
So, this is my heartfelt promise to myself to get in shape this year, tone up and relieve stress with exercise! I’m happy with my weight right now, but I would love to tone up and have a way to rid my body of the toxins and release endorphins and also make one of my life list dreams a reality!
To Audience: What dream or accomplishment would like to make a reality this year?
- Mood:determined
So, now, it's on to the next steps which will hopefully strengthen me in my own heart and mind and in turn, strengthen Shaun and me in our relationship together.
I have decided that this is my year of renewal. I have decided to learn from the past and leave the bad parts behind. That includes leaving my demons behind, or at least learning how to control them. This is my time to start anew and revitalized. I have made some promises to myself that I will not break. I have seen how much destruction my emotions and I are capable of and there is no way I will allow myself to cause that destruction again.
This also includes finding a new and better way to deal with my own mother, who has alot to do with all of this. She moved in with Shaun and me back in May and stayed for almost 4 months, about 3 months longer than we had anticipated or wanted. At the end of her stay, she started a fight with Shaun and me, during which she said some very nasty things to Shaun, yet he, being the calm and collected man he is, did not react back in hostility. So, she ended up looking like the fool. During her move out, she said some horrible and very hurtful things to me about Shaun, saying that as long as I was with him she didn't want to talk to me and if she saw him again she would hurt him. All of this was because she knew she was in the wrong, but wanted to make it about someone else. She had taken complete advantage of us, and had several opportunities to get out on her own earlier and didn't do it. She forced me into the position of having to push her out on her own and when I tried to rationalize with her, she turned into into a personal attack on us.
That whole experience caused some major anger inside of me like I'd never felt before. It made me feel like once again, my mother and her behavior was taking over my life. I'd heard my mother say those same kind of threatening things about other people in the past, and she always eventually got over it, sometimes in as little as 2 weeks. But, it didn't make it hurt less this time, because this was about the man I was supposed to marry. It made me feel like I was stuck in the middle and wondered if my own mother would ever be able to accept the man I was going to marry or if she'd always dislike him, even after we got married.
I let her affect me so much that it literally made me decide to just run away from it all and try to ignore my feelings and the reality that I was going to have to deal with all of this to have a successful relationship. I have had to deal with her my whole life, so I was just so done dealing. So, in all of that, I turned my back to Shaun and the rest is history. Now, Shaun and I have talked about all of this stuff and I am going to start going to some therapy to work through all of these mommy and daddy issues that I have so that I can learn how to have a successful relationship as an adult, without letting all of these issues raise their ugly heads later on or when the going gets tough.
My New Year's Resolutions/Goals:
~ Start with a clean slate
~ Finish my book
~ Look into freelance writing
~ Get signed with an acting agency and perform in commercials
~ Look into PR jobs
~ Quit smoking
~ Keep my new food lifestyle going to stay healthy
~ Go dancing
~ Sing more
~ Keep in contact with my friends and family
~ Plan/Go on a trip
~ Go to therapy (individual & couples)
~ Cook more, try new recipes
~ Ride bikes and exercise more
~ Open up about my feelings
~ Be honest
~ Save money
~ Plan surprises for my man
~ Stop/tone down the use of Myspace and Facebook (too distracting)
That's all for now. Ciao!
- Location:Home
- Mood:determined
I don't really want to say much because it's not really everybody's business. But, our wedding has been cancelled. We will not be getting married on April 25, 2009. Yes, it is officially cancelled, the chapel is already trying to book someone else on that day.
It was my decision not to move forward with the wedding. I have been having lots of stuff going on in my head and just did not feel right moving forward with planning and getting everyone more and more involved when I was feeling like this.
I am so sorry to anyone who had started making plans to fly here, etc. I'm sorry that we sent the Save the Date cards out and all. I know this must seem like a shock after receiving one of those. I was just trying really hard to get myself back into the wedding spirit...that was part of why we sent those out.
I don't know what Shaun and I are going to do from here. Right now, I am just trying to chill out and take a breather and think. I've been holding onto all of these feelings and worries for so long that I practically gave myself an ulcer. Right now, I just want to take some time and figure out what I want in regards to the relationship and my life in general.
I guess I am just more complicated than I originally thought...I could say I'm more f*#*ed up than I originally thought, but I don't believe that. I believe that I am smart enough to know that it's not right to go forward with a marriage unless you have thought it all through. It's not fair to the other person or myself. I do have alot of complicated things going on in my head and heart, but I have good reasons for those things.
Anyway, I just wanted to provide an update to anyone who may read this and who was wondering what the hell happened.
Can't say much more than that.
Krista (Kitt)
- Mood:
contemplative
Today her back doesn’t ache
in the place they tried to break
her will to balance torment.
Science fair ribbons don’t pay rent
to her landlord pimp at 53rd and 8th.
This morning her pimp kicked her out;
lucrative investments hold clout
in dirty business of “no hard feelings.”
Putrid streets inject and sting,
but at least her back doesn’t ache.
Four hundred dollar Manolo Blahniks
won’t earn 25 in pawn shop dealings.
Waitress tip-out won’t pay enough to take
one college course, plus “no street-whores allowed.”
A free hit warrants an excuse to make,
but she won’t lie, today her back doesn’t ache.
----------------------------------------
Rondeau Style
Today her back doesn’t ache
in the place they tried to break
her will to balance torment.
Pageant ribbons don’t pay rent
to her landlord pimp on 8th.
This morning he kicked her out;
supple investments hold clout,
in a world of “no hard feelings.”
Putrid streets inject and sting,
at least her back doesn’t ache.
Every cent gone to rent,
but she quit corner dealing.
Tonight the shelter ceiling
tiles help count her ways out.
A free hit offers a break,
but tonight her back doesn’t ache.
- Mood:
artistic
Barack Obama’s sweeping victory as president of the United States sends him to the White House to face what may be the worst national financial crisis since the time of Franklin Roosevelt’s election in 1932.
Obama won on his own terms, strategically and symbolically. He rolled up a series of contested states, from Colorado to Virginia, long out of Democratic reach. And his victory reflected the accuracy of his vision of a reshaped country. Racism, much discussed, turned out to be a footnote, and African-American turnout was not unusually high. Instead, Obama drew his strength from an array of racially mixed, growing areas around cities like Orlando, Washington, Indianapolis, and Columbus on his way to at least 334 electoral votes.
“Even as we celebrate tonight we know that the challenges tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime: two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century,” Obama told a crowd of more than 100,000 in Chicago’s Grant Park.
The assembled crowd had been strangely silent through the evening, even as Obama shut the door for McCain by winning New Hampshire and Pennsylvania, and even after his victory in Ohio pointed toward a landslide, seemingly unwilling to accept or believe the impending victory.
Only at 11:00 p.m., when CNN declared that Obama had surpassed 270 electoral votes, did the crowd roar in approval.
"This victory alone is not the change we seek — it is only the chance to make that change," Obama said, standing between two bulletproof glass walls.
McCain, speaking in a somber concession speech outside the Phoenix hotel where he married his wife, declared that he had done what he could.
"I don't know what more we could have done to try to win this election," he said.
Calling Obama "my president," McCain vowed to work with him to help repair a nation facing profound challenges at home and abroad.
"These are difficult times for our country, and I pledge to him tonight to do all in my power to help him lead us through the many challenges we face," McCain said.
After booing Obama's name and offering a few jeers, the crowd came to recognize the history in the evening when McCain paid tribute to the nation's first black president by recalling his own favorite commander-in-chief.
"A century ago, President Theodore Roosevelt's invitation of Booker T. Washington to dine at the White House was taken as an outrage in many quarters," McCain recalled. "America today is a world away from the cruel and prideful bigotry of that time. There is no better evidence of this than the election of an African-American to the presidency of the United States."
For the first time, claps and even a few cheers were heard from the dejected crowd.
Obama’s win came with Democratic gains in the Senate and House, though his broad victory — he swept swing states ranging from Indiana to Ohio to Virginia — was perhaps even more dramatic than his party’s success in congressional races. Obama and other Democratic leaders quickly signaled their awareness of the risk of overreaching, with Obama avoiding any claim of partisan victory, and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid going further.
"This is a mandate to get along, to get something done in a bipartisan way. This is not a mandate for a political party or an ideology,” Reid told Politico.
As grand as the symbolism of Obama’s victory was, it was also a victory for his steady, corporate campaign management. The campaign’s early decision to play on a more ambitious map than other Democratic nominees was the source of his mandate. And the result closely mirrored the PowerPoint presentation his campaign manager, David Plouffe, pitched to sometimes-skeptical audiences of reporters and donors.
McCain’s campaign blamed larger forces for their candidate’s defeat.
“We were crushed by circumstance,” communications director Jill Hazelbaker said after McCain’s speech. “The economic crisis was a pivotal point in this race.”
External factors aside, McCain and his campaign also lagged far behind Obama in every key metric — money, organization, discipline — and failed to embrace Obama's organizational model or the technology it borrowed from the private sector.
Earlier campaigns had celebrated their technological prowess, but in Obama’s cutting-edge campaign, new political technology was implemented and came of age, evidenced by its vaunted fundraising machine and its “Houdini” computer system, which enabled the campaign as late as Tuesday afternoon to identify and bring to the polls a last wave of supporters who hadn’t yet voted.
The coalition Obama assembled proved as modern as the technology his campaign employed.
In his clear-cut victory, Obama became the first Democrat to win a majority of American votes since Jimmy Carter’s 1976 election. He won states just months ago thought to be impregnable to his party, places that just four years ago went for President Bush by double-digits: Virginia, Indiana, and North Carolina among them.
Indeed, Obama won in all regions of the country but the Deep South, piling up big wins in the perennial Democratic bulwarks on both coasts and making deep inroads into New South states, the industrial and agricultural heartland and the fast-growing Rocky Mountain West.
But perhaps most spectacularly, he found victory with a multiracial coalition that has the makings of a formidable political base of power.
If his was the first 21st century campaign, his victory was powered by a new face of America: comprised of all ethnicities, hailing mostly from cities and suburbs, largely under 40 years old, and among all income classes.
As they emphatically proved by obliterating the presidential color line, many of these voters are not guided by traditional cultural attachment to race, religion or region.
What makes his victory so resounding, and so daunting for Republicans, was that he combined support from African-Americans, Jews, and young whites with other key groups. He also reversed President Bush’s advances with Hispanic voters.
Further, and even more worrisome for the GOP, Obama was dominant among self-described “moderate” voters, a 60 percent swath of Americans larger than either self-described liberals or conservatives.
This 21st century coalition allowed Obama to blow out McCain in cities and suburbs where Bush had narrowly won or lost by smaller margins four years ago, and to pull off narrow wins in Virginia, North Carolina, Florida, Indiana and Ohio.
He ran up huge margins in heavily-black cities and counties in each, but was able to edge out McCain thanks to big wins in populous, racially-mixed localities like Northern Virginia's Fairfax County (59 percent), Charlotte’s Mecklenburg County (62 percent), Orlando’s Orange County (59 percent), Indianapolis’s Marion County (64 percent) and Columbus’s Franklin County (59 percent).
The coalition underscored the theme that made Obama famous in 2004, and one that he returned to in his victory speech, citing his support from “young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled — Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America."
- Location:Work
- Mood:
jubilant
By: Maroon 5
After school
Walking home
Fresh dirt under my fingernails
And I can smell hot asphalt
Cars screech to a halt to let me pass
And I cannot remember
What life was like through photographs
Trying to recreate images life gives us from our past
And sometimes its a sad song
But I cannot forget
Refuse to regret
So glad I met you
Take my breath away
Make everyday
Worth all of the pain that I have
Gone through
And mama Ive been cryin
Cause things aint how they used to be
She said the battles almost won
And were only several miles from the sun
Moving on down the street
I see people I wont ever meet
Think of her, take a breath
Feel the beat in the rhythm of my steps
And sometimes its a sad song
But I cannot forget
Refuse to regret
So glad I met you
Take my breath away
Make everyday
Worth all of the pain that I have
Gone through
And mama Ive been cryin
Cause things aint how they used to be
She said the battles almost won
And were only several miles from the sun
The rhythm of her conversation
The perfection of her creation
The sex she slipped into my coffee
The way she felt when she first saw me
Hate to love and love to hate her
Like a broken record player
Back and forth and here and gone
And on and on and on and on
- Location:work
- Mood:
complacent - Music:Paramore
First thing is first, one of my best friends announced to me on Friday that she pregnant! YAY! It's kind of a strange situation because she and the father were in a long, serious relationship about 3 years ago (is that right Twigs?) and then broke up, she moved away, then came back to Texas and they started to see each other casually up until about 2 months ago. They had a bit of a falling out and weren't really talking and then she finds out the news. Wow, crazy huh? But, honestly, I am really happy for her because out of our group of friends, she is the one who really wants kids, with no doubts in her mind. We are kind of a different bunch of girls in our group (can it be called a "bunch" if it only consists of like 3? lol) in that we aren't all like jumping out of our pants with excitement at having kids soon. My friends Chris and Mary who recently got married aren't planning on it soon (that i know of) and Shaun and I will probably wait a couple years after we get hitched - more by my choice than his.
So, for Twiggy to be preggers is actually fitting because she is the one out of our group that has never doubted that she wanted to have children someday. This probably isn't her dream scenario, but it's happening and she is happy about it. I know she reads this blog, so I'm kind of reiterating what I already told her, but I am 100% supportive. No matter what happens between her and Matt (the daddy, of course) and no matter what her parents say or do, I am going to be there backing her up. This is actually the first time any of my good friends has been pregnant (other than my sis, but that's different) and I honestly can't be happier. My gut instinct is shooting off bolts of happiness and so I'm trusting my instinct.
In other news, the rehearsals for the play are going well! I have been driving to Duncanville a few nights a week to rehearse and it's totally worth the gas money and time. I absolutely loooove the character I get to play...She is basically an evil, manipulative, scorned woman, so I get to call to life any of my hidden demons, anger, frustration, sadness and sometimes the anger and demons I've seen in others to play the part. Seriously, there is no other part in Murder on the Nile I would want to be playing. According to my director, I'm doing quite well, but need to speak louder. That's not too hard to fix. And one of the crew members who watched us rehearse the other night stopped me afterwards to say "You are goood. You gave me chills." That was the best compliment I could get! lol The character is definitely not supposed to make the audience feel warm and cuddly.
The other headline of the day's blog, (how did this become a local TV News show?) my mother is still living with us. Yep...so let's count...that puts us at OVER 3 MONTHS now!!!! She is supposed to be moving this coming week, and I'm having lunch with her today so I will make sure to find out what the deal is with that. I am just going to pray with all my might to the swift-kick-in-the-ass god out there to do what he does best and get her moving on her merry way without a hassle. Shaun is being EXTREMELY patient, but I know that he is not happy with her dragging her feet and isn't saying it, but probably isn't happy with me for not forcing the issue on her more. But, what I have to deal with is the possible backlash from her when I bring it up forcefully. She knows what she has to do and agreed to it and I shouldn't have to be the grown-up and force it more. I'm so freaking tired of being the grown-up with her and I'm kind of refusing to do it. I will say that for the past 3 months, I have felt a bit like a child of divorced parents must feel. Constantly running back and forth between one and the other, trying all the time to keep them both happy in their respective ways, trying to keep them from having a reason to fight with each other, trying to keep the peace because I know that if I don't I'll be living in a hell house. Argh. Luckily, they have been quite cordial to each other, but I've been on my toes for over 3 months just waiting for the you-know-what to hit the fan. I just cannnot wait till she has her own place. I will finally be able to breathe again.
Regarding family news, my grandma has been officially moved to an Assisted Living Facility in Fort Worth. She has alzheimers and some other old people issues and my aunt and uncle just didn't feel they could take care of everything anymore. I haven't seen her in the facility yet, she just moved and I just saw her like 2 weeks ago, before she had moved. She was already kind of talking about it, but in the sense that she didn't quite understand that she is the one actually moving there. I feel sorry for her because she has to live with confusion everyday of her life and can't escape it. However, the confusion is kind of good in a way, because she may not realize what the real situation is...like, when she was in the hospital, she kept thinking she was in her room. If we just let her think that, she seemed to be ok and calm. Whenever someone tried to remind her she was in the hospital (really people, what is the point of doing that to her?) she would get really agitated and surprised like "What? Why am I in the hospital?" I think that is worse than just letting her think she is home. Trying to get her to see the reality is not to benefit her, it's to benefit the people around her who desperately want her to be able to see and comprehend the reality. They just don't want to believe that she really can't.
Anyway, I had this really creepy dream last night that Grandma passed away and she was buried. For some reason, we had to dig her up, and when we did, the coffin had transformed into a shoebox. When they opened it, her body was gone, like had disintegrated. And whoever was there with us, was like, "Oh no, they forgot to put in formaldehyde and preserve her." And yes, i know that in real life they disintegrate and aren't preserved for all eternity, but it was a dream and in the dream the faulty logic made sense. It was so freaking weird!!! Eww just gives me the creeps thinking about it. I watch way too much Law & Order SVU.
I still don't have my blood test results back...I will be calling the dr.'s office on Monday. The results may not be in yet, but I can at least try. The suspense is killing me. I know I've got something wrong with me and my digestive system, but I just am not positive I know what it is. On a good note, my when i went in for the blood tests, I had to get weighed and turns out I've dropped 7 lbs in the month between visits. Woo hoo! That is definitely due to the fact that I have almost completely cut out gluten filled products, other than a couple slip ups which I have paid for. So, either way, I'm going to keep eating the way that I have been and hopefully drop another 7 lbs! That would put me at a weight I haven't been for like 6 years! tee hee! *Kitt bounces with giddyness (is that a word?)
Ok, so I'd better stop typing or my fingers are going to fall off. Ciao for now!
Krista
- Location:home
- Mood: busy
I'm sure for the readers of this, there aren't many of you, but oh well - you may remember an entry I did a while back about Psoriasis. I was diagnosed with it when I was 9 years old and still have it. It is an autoimmune disorder which means it is life-long and it's caused by certain things in my body fighting off some other things and not absorbing nutrients correctly.
Well, recently, I spoke with one of my friend's husband, who recently was diagnosed with gluten-intolerance or Celiac Disease, another autoimmune disorder. I first heard of Celiac a couple of years ago, and remember thinking that I could very well have that because many of the symptoms sounded like things I've been dealing with for years. Most of them are kinda embarrassing and hard to talk about, which is why I haven't really told my Dr about them before now (bathroom issues if u really must know). Well, more recently, I have had some really strange things happening with my body and it's prompting me to get tested for gluten-intolerance/Celiac. I've been having neuropathy symptoms which many Celiacs have because if your body isn't absorbing the right vitamins and nutrients, your nerves don't always perform the way they are supposed to. For the past 3 years, off and on, I have had these tingling sensations down my arms and legs, and more recently have had shaking that was uncontrollable and balance issues (not even from drinking! tee hee).
This stuff has scared me more than the gastro symptoms because I've had the gastro symptoms since I was a kid. Most of my friends and family don't know that about me because I don't go around broadcasting it. I've gotten used to it over the years and just assumed that it was the way I am and I have to just deal with it.
I've stayed away from eating lots of bread for a while, mainly so that I didn't have too many carbs. But, I was still eating wheat/flour tortillas almost every day as a wrap with lunch meat. Anyway, if my blood work comes back positive, which in this case means I do have a gluten-intolerance, it will mean that I need to stay gluten-free pretty much the rest of my life. To actually find out if I have Celiac Disease, I would have to have positive blood work and a biopsy to accurately determine it.
Anyway, I decided to go gluten-free for at least a week to see if I felt any better. I felt fabulous! I'm not joking. I had no more stomach rumbling everyday, no more gas pains, less brain fog, emotionally felt more even-keeled(sp?), more normal bathroom breaks (lol), etc. So, either way, I'm going low to no gluten whether my tests come back positive or not. If I could eliminate alot of my issues and maybe even get OFF of anti-depressant medication, that would be worth giving up bread and regular pizza! These days, there are so many choices of gluten-free stuff on the market, so I won't be totally out of luck!
Many people with the intolerance or the disease, are underweight when diagnosed because their body doesn't absorb enough to put on weight. However, on the other side of the spectrum, many people with it are overweight or don't appear malnourished because their body isn't absorbing all it should, so they have much bigger appetites. Their body is kind of in a starvation mode, so it holds on to all the fat it can and so the person looks normal or even overweight.
When I was on the gluten-free diet for 8 days, I lost 3 lbs immediately. Admittedly, part of that was probably water weight and I didn't eat as much. I did not have a ravenous appetite like I usually do, and I had to remind myself to eat so that I wouldn't get too weak or dizzy. I have no doubt that for me, this diet will help ALOT of things. I do want to know if I actually have the positive bloodwork though, because Celiac Disease can cause many other things. To name a few, directly from the Celiac Disease Foundation website: http://www.celiac.org/cd-symptoms.php
are: Depression, early osteoporosis, spontaneous miscarriages, infertility, Iron Deficiency -which i was told by a dr I have- just to name a few. Check out the website for more info.
Elizabeth Hasselbeck on the the View has Celiac Disease. Check out this clip from the show which explains more...
Anyway, Celiac is genetic, so if I do have it, that means I got it from one or both of my parents, meaning they probably have it. Oh and Schizophrenia has been linked to Celiac disease...go figure(my father diagnosed with Schiz twice). Oh and Psoriasis is linked to it. wow
I kind of hope that the blood tests are positive, because it would explain SOOOO much that I have had to deal with almost my whole life and I can control it with food! Plus, if I get positive blood results, then it's provable and I won't just seem like I'm being difficult about food.
Ciao for now!
Krista
- Location:home
- Mood: cheerful
Visit Japan
Live in another state (have lived in Texas my entire 23 years on this lovely Earth)
Visit England
Visit Ireland – again
Learn to surf, even if it's not well
Play the cello well again (played for 2 years about 12 yrs ago)
Have my novel published
See my brothers Devin & Corey for 1st time in 6 years
Have my niece and nephew over for a sleepover
Go on a road trip with my girlfriends
- Location:Everywhere and nowhere
- Mood: creative
- Music:The Calling
I have bolded the parts that I thought were the most correct in terms of my life, who I am, what I want and how I think.
Birth name:
Krista Michelle Pugh
Date of birth: October 27, 1984
Hi there Krista,
Thank you for visiting my website at www.123numerology.com, and for requesting this free mini-reading and ongoing numerology tutorial.
Over the coming weeks, I'll be giving you a wealth of information about numerology (all completely free of charge!). I look forward to taking the journey with you - numerology is a true passion of mine, and it is my hope that you find numerology to be just as fascinating as I do.
Let's jump right in by starting to analyze your numerology chart ...
The best place to start is with one of the most basic calculations ... your "life path" -- based on your birth date of October 27, 1984 -- is 5.
How Is Your Life Path Calculated ? This is calculated in four steps: 1) Add up the digits in your month of birth (if more than one digit) With all the above calculations, we keep adding until we end up with a single digit, or an 11 or 22 (which are special cases in numerology, known as "Master Numbers"). In your case Krista, you were born on October 27, 1984. Your month of birth is October, which is the 10th month. Adding 1 + 0 gives us 1. Your day of birth is the 27th. Adding 2 + 7 gives us 9. Your year of birth is 1984. Adding 1 + 9 + 8 + 4 gives us 22. Note that we don't add the two digits in 22, because 22 is known as a 'Master Number'. The totals, then, are 1, 9, and 22. To get our final answer, we add these three numbers together: Adding 1 + 9 + 22 gives us 32. Adding 3 + 2 gives us 5. |
Your life path says a lot about you, so please read the following very carefully ...
Krista, your Life Path of 5 ...
You are about freedom, independence and the right to follow where your heart and gut-instincts lead you in life. You are an inquisitive soul with many questions that can only be answered through travel, exploration and experiencing a variety of life situations. For this reason you are likely to relocate to various cities or countries during your life and also entertain a number of life partners as opposed to just one soul mate. |
Your Expression - which describes your potential natural talents and abilities - works out to be a 8.
How Is Your Expression Calculated? What we are going to do now is turn all the letters in your name at birth into numbers,
In practice I put the vowels above the name and the consonants underneath. This is because your Soul Urge is derived from the vowels alone, so it makes it easier at the next step to do it this way. Again there is one exception to the rule and this is with the letter ‘Y’. If it acts as a consonant and is pronounced it is classed as being a consonant. If it is not pronounced or acts as a vowel it is classed as being a vowel. The ‘Y’ in Yolande, for instance, would be classed as being a consonant, but the ‘Y’ in Larry would be classed as being a vowel as it acts as a vowel. Let’s work out your Expression number, Krista : Using the above chart we would put a 2 below the 'K' of your first name. We would follow this with a 9 placed below the 'r', then a 9 above the 'i', a 1 below the 's', and so on ... We then carry on in the same manner with the rest of your name. When you are finished, you should end up with a chart like this:
Now we simply add up the numbers in each row. The top row: Adding 9 + 1 + 9 + 5 + 5 + 3 gives us 32. Adding 3 + 2 gives us 5. The bottom row: Adding 2 + 9 + 1 + 2 + 4 + 3 + 8 + 3 + 3 + 7 + 7 + 8 gives us 57. Adding 5 + 7 gives us 12. Adding 1 + 2 gives us 3. . We now add the total of the top and bottom rows, which gives us 5+3=8. And so, Krista, your Expression is 8. |
What a '8' Expression Means About You
Now that we've done the calculations, what does this actually mean?
Krista, your Expression of 8 ...
The optimum result of your life expression is the accumulation of wealth. Just because you are materialistic does not mean you are not spiritual, however. Many number eights believe that the wealth that they create in their lives is an expression of their soul's ability to circulate good energy in their life.
|
Now, Let's Examine Your Soul Urge
(also known as your "Heart's Desire")
We have already done all the mathematics necessary to work out this number. It is simply the total of the top row (the vowels) of your full birth name.
In your case Krista, this totals 5.
Krista, your Soul Urge of 5 ...
You love change. You live to experience as much as possible in the shortest amount of time possible. You appreciate the fact that life is short and are bound and determined to make the most of every minute you have on this earth. You have an inquisitive mind and a thirst for adventure that is only slaked by the collecting of unusual experiences and plenty of travel. |
- Mood:
bored
Things are getting to a point in my life right now, that I'm starting to feel that something bad is going to happen. Like, someone is going to die. This feeling is getting stronger now that a certain event happened the other day. I got word that Robyn was taken to the hospital by ambulance because she was having multiple seizures. These seizures were drug induced. Robyn is a drug addict who has been to rehab once already (at 23) but has not ever been completely sober since she was about 18 (hence the time our friendship started to change). Her life, for the past few years, has quite simply put, been a tragedy to everyone who is watching. She was an extremely intelligent woman, beautiful, tough, and strong who seemed to have a bright future ahead. All of that changed, slowly but surely, and she has never been the same since.
In the past year, her family and I have seen her go through spurts where she seems to be doing great. She seems to be staying sober, working, keeping up with friends and talking at length about all the things she wants to do in her life. But, we all have been hesitant to believe too much of what she says will actually be made a reality, because we have seen her fall from that high perch many times before.
So, the story about the other day is that she has been hanging out with some new "friend" who lives in her apt. complex. I guess this woman is a drug user too, and according to Robyn's mom, "pure trash." Robyn was extremely high on ice (meth), cocaine and I don't know what else, when she started having seizures at the new "friend's" house. The girl was freaked, rightly so, and called 911. Of course Robyn didn't want that b/c she knew what she had done, but she needed to go to the hospital. Supposedly, she had a few seizures back to back at that girl's apt, 2 in the ambulance, 2 at the hospital and even one more on the way home to her mom's house. I spoke with her mom yesterday and she told me Robyn will definitely be moving back home with her parents. THANK GOD. That is one good thing that is coming out of this.
By the way, the seizure thing is not new, Robyn has been diagnosed with a serious seizure disorder (idk if it's epilepsy), but to make it clear, she never had a seizure until after she got out of rehab. So, this disorder is more than likely a result of her addiction. It could be that she had it already, but the drug withdrawls or whatever brought it on. Who knows. All I know is that now, there is no denying how sick she is. She is not only an addict, I think she has mental issues that are causing alot of her behavior and on top of that, she is sick physically with the seizure disorder.
I feel somewhat guilty b/c half of me feels so angry at her, b/c I feel like she has become weak and she can do so much better and she just isn't. But, half of me feels so sorry for her, b/c I don't know if she could completely control her actions by herself, even if she tried.
I just hope and pray that living at home, with supervision, no cell phone, no car, etc will do her good. I pray she can have a happy and productive life someday, instead of the alternative, which is, even according to her doctor, death.
- Mood:
distressed
Peace and love
K
Our friends Mary and Chris got married a week and a half ago on June 21st in Sulfur, Louisiana. Woo Hoo! Congrats you guys! We love you! But, I do have to say....damn it was humid!!! lol! (Sorry Dirt, it had to be said.) Hey, at least I probably sweat off about 3lbs dancing around in that moist Louisiana air. I totally felt like I was part of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood which is the reason I actually would love to go back to Louisiana again soon...I'm thinking next time it'll be New Orleans. :-)
The wedding was all and more than I could have imagined. Mary's parents' home is absolutely GORGEOUS, out on this big plot of land, on a quiet, lovely road. The ceremony and reception were both held under billowing, white tents. On the reception tables, small, un-intrusive candles flickered in glass holders, on top of iridescent chiffon tablecloth overlays. The ceremony and reception seemed small - I'm not actually sure how many people attended, but it seemed like the perfect amount. The buffet line offered a varied assortment (sounds like I'm writing a commercial for Kroger) of Louisiana favorites like crab cakes and clam dip and there was even a meat carver set up to dish out any amount of meat you wanted...I mean come on, who could ask for more? (We Texan girls love our meat. Just ask Jessica Simpson.)
Mary looked absolutely radiant, elegant and more beautiful than I've ever seen her. The smile she wore all night was the best accessory. And Chris didn't look too bad himself! Seeing the two of them together, there was no doubt in my mind that these kids are gonna be great together. I feel so lucky to know and be friends with these two intelligent, funny, kind, enlightened and fun people. I can still remember the first time I ever talked to Mary. I was on the phone with Shaun when we first started dating and he said his friend Mary, who was dating his roommate at the time, wrote for the Shorthorn. I was planning on applying there because my major was Journalism and I was just starting college. She gave me some advice and even said I could use her as a reference. I didn't get the job back then, but that was probably because I applied too late. (I ended up working for the Shorthorn later anyway, so it's all good!) Anyway, I am just so glad that Shaun knew Mary and that we have all remained friends over these years and through all the changes (you guys know what I'm talking about! lol) I totally love Mary more now than ever and feel honored to have been part of her wedding to a wonderful and respectful man. Holla at ya girl!
On a different topic, I am in a bit of a what-do-i-want-to-do-with-my-life slump (hence, the subject line of this blog.) Before I go on, I must qualify the rest of this paragraph by saying that I really do like my new job at JP Morgan Chase as a Sr. Communications Analyst (yes, they changed my title from simply Communication Associate and it rocks!) I love the fact that I always have tons to work on, so I'm never just twiddling my thumbs, I have tons of respect automatically because VPs and Managers are coming to our team to have us do what they don't know how to do (write) and the people I work with are nice and pretty cool. However (you knew that was coming), the subject matter of the material I write about, edit and research is not exactly the stuff my dreams are made of. And, I know that realistically, it would be difficult to find a way to write what I really want and make the same money I am now. And really, I have just been procrastinating when it comes to writing on my book, etc.-- I need a new computer chair! I'm sitting on a wrought-iron backed chair from the dinner table! -- On top of all that, I feel guilty even writing about these thoughts b/c now it sounds like I'm just never happy. I mean, when I was working in TV News, I couldn't say it was boring, but it made me depressed and it wasn't fulfilling enough for me. Now, I'm saying I need more excitement and want to write about more interesting things.
At the same time though, if I don't have these thoughts every once in a while and entertain the thought of what my next step is, how will I ever move higher and get closer to my goals? I guess I've just had this idea in my head that once I pass a certain age, certain opportunities just aren't going to be available to me anymore and I will have missed my chance. It sounds silly, but I've had several things that I've wanted to look into for a while, but I kind of wrote them off as silly or futile. For instance, trying out to be in commercials. I don't want to move to LA to be an actor like most people who are in commercials. I just thought if they were ever filming here, it would be an awesome way to make some extra dough and have fun doing it. Also, stage acting. I have done that at school in the past and have always had this love for the stage. It's such a rush to be up there in front of people and it teaches you to have more confidence in yourself because you can't be afraid of what people are thinking when they look at you because they will be. It's about the acting, portraying a character, saying the lines with conviction, the rehearsals with fun people, the inside jokes among actors and stage crew... I really do miss that.
I think now that I am more settled in my job and all, I can start branching out in my free time to incorporate these hobbies. These are the things that really make me feel like who the person I really am. The difference now is that I don't have a structured environment planning it all out for me like school. I have to take initiative and get out there and sign up!
Anyway, now that I've written my novel of a blog, I think I will say Peace Out to this computer screen and damn wrought-iron chair from the dinner table. Maybe next time I'm on I will have a real computer chair! Woo hoo!
Ciao, Peace and Love
- Location:Computer Room @ Home
- Mood:
curious
Taking risks on new horizons...
Current mood: 
adventurous
Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes
I just thought I’d take this opportunity to tell any readers about a new development in my life that is going to make my whole life different, but BETTER. I GOT THE JOB! As many of you know, I have been going after full-time work since the 1st of this year. I graduated from UTA last December, and my hope was to have a full-time position with benefits by May or before. I’ve had health insurance through UTA for the past 4 1/2 years and they’ve even let me continue with them until 6 months after I graduated. So, that is only a couple more months. So, I knew I was going to be in a bind if something didn’t start happening soon!
I applied to many, many positions online and even through direct connections, but I just wasn’t having any luck! And, obviously, I asked my current boss if there was any need for a full-time employee at the news station...to no avail. It is just VERY difficult to get full-time work at a news station. That’s just how it is.
Plus, honestly, I am REALLY tired and kind of bored with t.v. news. I’ve worked in it for the past 4 1/2 years almost non-stop. I’ve seen the ins and outs of it, the good and the bad...I’m just ready for something new. How will I know if I’m good at something else unless I try? I just see myself in a much more professional environment. Oh, and the money...yeah. It’s kind of ridiculous that you have people working in a business to produce a show that is viewed by millions every, single day, and the people get paid very little. It’s the way it’s been for years and years, and I’m not expecting it to change. But, I don’t love it enough to work my butt off, stressing out, having ulcers over measly money. No thanks. I’m not saying I will never return to television. Maybe I will. But, right now, I’ve got my sights set on a new horizon.
Anyway, about 3 months ago I applied to JPMorgan & Chase Home Finance Division for their Marketing Communications Associate position. It involves alot of writing, editing, and formulating new ideas for the company to use in promotions. Anyway, it took a while for me to hear from them, but I finally did. I had a phone interview, a face-to-face interview and a few days later, they made me an offer! Let’s just say, the offer includes a much better salary than I ever expected...that’s all I’m gonna say about that! :-) :-) :-) I obviously accepted the offer and I start the new job on Tuesday! WOO HOO!
I just wanted to share this with everyone because it’s the latest in big changes my life is taking and I want y’all to be a part of it. I am even going to have great benefits, paid vacation days and a normal schedule. Weekends off!!! YAY! (If you have ever worked in news you know how rare it is to have a normal 8-5 schedule! I can’t wait!
This just goes to show that persistence and patience can pay off. Also, maybe it also takes a risk. If I’d told myself 4 years ago that I didn’t have a chance in getting the CBS11 job because of my age, I would never have gotten it and worked there for 3 years. If I hadn’t taken a risk in applying for this job where I will have to learn a whole new way of working, I wouldn’t have it now. Moral of the story people: taking risks can be scary, but the fear can pay off into something better than you could have ever imagined.
Ciao!
- Mood: accomplished
Below are some quotes I found in a book...and I don't agree with everything this dude says, but he in these particular quotes he has written and had published some of the same thoughts I have had, yet didn't have the guts to put down permanently.
At this point in my life, I am tired of playing games. I'm tired of having to nod and smile, pretending to agree with all the mumbo jumbo, while inside I'm saying "no, don't agree, nope don't agree, NO i DON'T agree!" So, I am of the opinion right now, that if Christians, Buddhists, Hindus and Jews can all so confidently tell everyone around them what they so adamantly believe, then why can't I be honest about what I believe or don't believe? I mean, I definitely do not want to start a fight or religious war among friends and family. But, I just find it very unfair that people who don't have a particular religion they live by and even people who don't believe in God are shunned from society basically on the condition that those shunning them don't understand that point of view. It scares them. And they don't want to even consider that those agnostics and athiests could possibly know a thing or two, because if they even considered it that would mean everything they have been living their entire life for could be wrong.
Trust me, I know, because I was one of those people. The truth is, when I started questioning and researching other faiths and science, etc. I was in about my second year of college. College did it for me. Shaun didn't do it, other friends didn't do it. I had always harbored these questions and deep-seeded personal beliefs (non-faith based beliefs) and I choose right now to defend those beliefs. Why shouldn't I? It does not make me some heathen or bad human being. It doesn't make me any different than I was yesterday or the day before. I'm just being more honest than I was yesterday or the day before.
"While all faiths have been touched, here and there, by the spirit of ecumenicalism, the central tenet of every religious tradition is that all others are mere repositories of error, or, at best, dangerously incomplete. Intolerance is thus intrinsic to every creed. Once a person believes--really believes--that certain ideas can lead to eternal happiness, or to its antithesis, he cannot tolerate the possibility that the people he loves might be led astray by the blandishments of unbelievers. Certainty about the next life is simply incompatible with tolerance in this one."
"There is clearly a sacred dimension to our existence, and coming to terms with it could well be the highest pupose to human life. But we will find that it requires no faith in untestable propositions--Jesus was born of a virgin; the Koran is the word of God--for us to do this."
"The idea that any one of our religions represents the infallible word of the One True God requires an encyclopedic ignorance of history, mythology, and art even to be entertained--as the beliefs, rituals, and iconography of each of our religions attest to centuries of cross-pollination among them.
Whatever their imagined source the doctrines of modern religions are no more tenable than those which, for lack of adherents, were cast upon the scrap heap of mythology millennia ago; for there is no more evidence to justify a belief in the literal existence of yahweh and Satan than there was to keep Zeus perched upon his mountain throne or Poseidon churning the seas."
- Mood:
aggravated
Okay, so my last entry was about the fact that a few things have been frustrating me lately. One of the things causing me lots of anxiety was the upcoming meeting with Fr. Jim at St. Maria's about a wedding there. Shaun and I had several talks about what we both wanted, what we believe, what we don't believe, etc. before this time. So, we both agreed that we would not be surprised or completely broken-hearted if we were told we could not marry at SMG. We knew that with our views and dedication to living in an honest and non-hypocritical way, it was very possible that we would be told "You don't like our rules? Sorry, gotta say, 'see ya!'"
Today at 2pm was the meeting, and guess what we were told? (Just read the subject line.) It all came down to Fr. Jim asking me if I could promise that I would perpetuate my Catholic Faith from here on out, did I believe in everything regarding Jesus/God, etc. and would I be willing to have my children Baptized, raised, and confirmed in the Catholic church. It's just not right to say, "um, yeah, suuurrre," when I'm not sure. I mean, come on! This is one of the most important times of my life, one of the most important decisions...if you lie about something SO serious and important, there is no hope for honesty later on. Fr. Jim said that even with the fact that Shaun is basically Agnostic, as long as I swore, under oath, to the above topics, we could get married in the church. Well, it was very difficult, and I had to choke back my emotions, but I told him the truth and said I could not promise to those things. He said that if Shaun and I are still in flux when it comes to our faith, spiritual beliefs, etc., then we should consider getting married at a different venue. Fr. Jim then asked me to explain to him what I believe, or don't believe. He was very kind about all of it, and I'm really appreciative of his understanding. He told us both that he respected our integrity with the fact that we would rather risk not getting married in the church to be honest about our beliefs. He also told us that even if we get married in a different venue and decide one day that we want to do the whole Catholic life, we can get our marriage blessed in the Catholic church. That is nice to know...I doubt we will do it, but it's nice to know.
If I have to be honest, the only reasons I wanted to get married in the Catholic Church are all cosmetic, surface reasons. For instance, I grew up in the church. It's got a great center aisle. I sang there so I know the pianist and choir director. There are other reasons like that and one of the main reasons was that my mother still goes there and she is pretty much obsessed with being Catholic. I guess in some way I was under this impression that if we were to get married in the Catholic church she would just be happy and it would make everything easier. I know in my heart of hearts that is not true. No matter what, a wedding and the bigger part: a marriage are dependent upon the bride and groom being in tune with the needs of each other, aware of their similarities and differences, a willingness to compromise and ability to deal well with each other's families. But, nothing we do can make Mom completely happy and content. The fact of the matter is, if she wants a Catholic wedding, let her get married in a Catholic church.
If we were to get married in the church, we would be living a lie. To anyone who really knows us, it would seem like we were just trying to look good or be people that we are not. I don't want to live my life that way and especially don't want to start my marriage off on that foot.
Well, so, today finally decided it for me. I have pretty much only been attending church with Mom so she will keep off of my back and because it was something we did together. But, it doesn't seem right anymore. I mean, I was told today that if I don't get married in the Catholic church, I can't even receive holy communion. Not that I really believe it's the "real presence of Christ," but basically I was told that once I get married outside of the church, all of the sacraments I took growing up: baptism, first communion, confirmation--are all null. I think that's the one that makes me the most upset. But, you know...now I know that I cannot have my no-religion and eat it too! lol!
So, now, it's on to looking for venues where we can have a gorgeous wedding; a venue where we are wanted and where we can truly FOCUS on the fact that this will be a day to celebrate our vowing to share our lives forever.
We always knew there would be bumps in the road...it's never defeated us before. We can get through anything; that's why we are meant to be together.
- Mood: melancholy
I've picked my Matron and bridesmaids already. My sister Anna will be my Matron of Honor (since she's married already,) Steph, Robyn and Victoria will be bridesmaids. I may have Lisa, Shaun's younger sis also, but it is contingent upon whether she goes to study abroad in Japan. I obviously don't want her to give up on that just to come to the wedding because we will have many other times to spend time and party with her later.
I want my Uncle Steve to walk me down the aisle, but haven't asked him yet. I know he will be honored. I already asked my Mom and she said she would be uncomfortable, I guess because it will put more emphasis on the fact that my father isn't there. Whatever. She has never really understood my point of view on anything, so I don't know why I expect her to now when it's actually important. In alot of ways, I'd rather have Steve anyway, because he is the closest father-like figure to me and he and his family really took me under their wing and made me part of their family, almost as their own child. I feel closer to them than I do to the Straley side; other than my sister...but I don't really include her in the "Straley" side of the family. She is a Barber-Davis and my best friend so yeah. She has her own category. :-)
There are a couple frustrations in my daily world. The first one is that I haven't heard from Mr. Connolly at KVIL Lite FM about the job. He said it would be a week to 10 days, and it's about 10 days today. I know I need to stay calm about it, but I can't exactly move forward on any other job stuff until I know what he wants me to do. I have applied to a few other jobs as a writer, like a proposal writer position, technical writer, junior copy writer. No word yet on those.
The second frustration in my life is that I have gained about 4 lbs back since graduation. I was doing SO WELL! Part of it is that I was walking so much on campus everyday. It was a given that on any given day I could walk about 2 miles just going to and from classes. Plus, when it was getting close to graduation and the holidays, I was nervous and didn't eat much. I had the goal to look good in all my pictures and I did achieve that goal. I'm really proud that I did and now I can be proud to show off the pics from that time. However, now, I have the new goal to lose about 10 more lbs. All it means is that I have been set back a bit since my last goal was set. It was pretty awesome when I only had like 5 more to lose. Sounds alot less daunting. However, I know losing 10 isn't that bad. It just means I need to eat more veggies (which I need anyway for various reasons,) and I need to keep up with my working out. I've been doing pretty well this week. I already worked out twice and I know I will tomorrow morning.
So, here and now, I want to set the goal to lose another 10 lbs which should put me at about 116. That would be exactly what I want to be!!! I had said 115, so 116 would be perfecto!!!
ok, I could write alot more, but I have to go get ready for lunch with Elizabeth!
Peace!
- Location:home
- Mood: hopeful
- Music:gnarles barkley
I got tagged by Diry/Mary, who is not actually dirty, and is better than a Bloody Mary! LOL! So without further ado:
The Meme
Rules:
1. Write your meme (described below).
2. Include the rules in your post (though you may reword them in your style).
3. Link to the person who tagged you, then link to the seven (7) random people you have tagged.
4. Let those seven (7) random people know they’ve been tagged by commenting in their blog. Also say something nice about the post so you don’t come off totally random. Say, on a blog about a dog’s death, you might not want to come in and go, “Hi! I’m all smiley and stuff! You’ve been tagged! Go to my blog! Yippie!” Instead, you might begin with, “I am so sorry about your loss!” Wait, maybe use a period there.
And now the meme:
Share seven (7) random and/or weird things about yourself.
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Seven (7) Random and/or Weird Things About Yourself
1. "Kitt": The name Kitt comes from a short, yet silly story. At the guys' old apartment, (meaning Shaun, my boyfriend & Jeremy Maes' apt,) I think I'd had a couple drinks and went out on the smoking patio. While sitting on the ugly orange patio couch the guys had stolen who-knows-when, I was talking to Jeremy and we got on the topic of me being a "night rider," which turned into "KnightRider," and I think Jeremy suggested I should call myself "Kitt" after the car in KnightRider. It simply worked because my name starts with K and Kitt sounds cute!
2. Providence: I only waited tables for about 2 months at Birraporetti's and realized I didn't have time for it, plus I sucked. However, I knew soon after leaving B.P.'s that providence had placed me there. I had never thought I'd wait tables before that, but I remember reasoning it out by saying I'll never be this young and energetic again, I may as well try. I just happened to pick B.P.'s cause it was nicer...I'd only eaten there one time before I applied. I know that all those reasons led up to me working there and meeting my now boyfriend Shaun. We have been together ever since I left B.P's 4 1/2 years ago.
3. Catholic: I grew up very Catholic from the age of 5-18. I still have tons of respect for the church and many of the teachings of love, forgiveness, hope, etc..
At one point when I was about 15 I thought I could be a nun one day.....Not joking. What was I thinking? That thought lasted for a day by the way.
I honestly don't know what I personally believe about God's true existence. Logically, I don't believe, but emotionally I do. I do know that most of the time I'd rather believe than not believe. Recently, when my grandma got sick and an old friend passed away, my heart was thrust back into a place of faith. I know that's so cliche'. But, Grandma Lucille has been a faithful Catholic all her life and always found it very important. So, in a way, I guess I feel like her impending death has made me see the good side of faith again...at least for right now.
4. Lemons into Lemonade: Many of my not-as-close friends in elementary, junior and high school never knew I had a big sister named Anna. Due to custody issues (looooong story,) Anna was out of the lives of my mother and I for 5 whole years-from the time she was 10 to 15 and I was only 5-10. Luckily, when she got old enough to stand up to her father, she started visiting us again. When we saw her after those 5 years, she and I immediately noticed we had similar characteristics and little habits--but we hadn't even been around each other! spooky! Now, it is 13 years later and my sister Anna is my best friend. There is no way i will ever go without seeing her for even a couple months again.
5. Rover: I have never had a pet for longer than about 2 years. We would either give them away because we had to move into an apartment, they died or ran away. It's actually quite humorous now that I write it out! LOL. I VOW, someday I will have a pet for longer than 2 years!!!! LOL.
6. Scorpio: I have always felt that I am a Scorpio through and through. However, "Pluto" is a Scorpio's planetary ruler. If astrologists have discounted Pluto as a planet, does that mean Scorpio is no more?! Help!---
These are the traits I think make me a Scorpio:
1) we are not content to sit back and observe the world, we want to build change.
2)We put significant energy into intimate relationships, professional and social causes that may seem esoteric to less penetrating folks.
3) We are intense with a lust for life. Scorpio has a famed sexuality which stems from their ability to intuit others' unspoken desires and fantasies.
4) Possessive.
5)Pleasure in expression through art.
6) Make friends easily but are basically introverted
7) Scorpios develop a sharp, delightful and poignant sense of humor to cope with what they learn about the human condition.
8) Enjoy making and buying art.
9) Have extreme opinions about music and drama and taste for mysticism.
10) Rarely shocked by others' behavior.
7. Music. I am a singer. At this moment, I am not doing any singing in a formal forum, but I will always be a singer at heart. I started singing in a controlled environment when I was about 7 years old in a children's choir at school, continued into the young adult choir. I also sang in junior high show choir and high school acapella choir. I was always a 1st Soprano, which means if needed, I could hit the highest notes. I put singing on the back-burner duing the last couple years of college because I couldn't get to choir practices, and didn't feel it right to go to church to sing in the choir if I didn't feel I was really as much of a believer as the others. Eventually, i will find a way to sing in a controlled setting on a regular basis in an unpressured atmosphere.
Tagging:
Dirt
7wigz
No one else I know has a separate blog page. I need more friends or at least need to know my friends' blog addresses! oh well!
- Location:at home
- Mood: chipper
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Chance Robichaux was one of my friends is 9th and 10th grade, after which we grew apart a bit. We even kind of "went out" for a very short period of young-puppy-like time. He and his family lived down the street from my best friend Robyn Bailey so we would all hang out alot, doing mischievious teenager things.
We will miss Chance and his silly sense of humor and how he always made us feel like kids. He was practically still a kid when he passed, but I guess life jaded our boy. We will never fully know why he's gone, but we do know that he deserved only happiness and peace, and I hope he has some now.
Chance Westly Robichaux, 22, a Marine Corps corporal, passed away Sunday, Nov. 11, 2007.
Funeral: 3:30 p.m. Saturday in the chapel at Moore Funeral Home. Interment: Moore Memorial Gardens, with full military honors. Visitation: noon to 2 p.m. Saturday at the funeral home.
Chance was born June 8, 1985, in Lemoore, Cali., to John Joseph Robichaux and Denise Dalton Love. He grew up and lived in Arlington most of his life. He graduated from Lamar High School in 2003 and immediately joined the United States Marine Corps. He was currently stationed at Beaufort Marine Corps Air Station in South Carolina, Unit-MALS 31, as an electrical instrument flight control system technician, and had achieved the rank of corporal.
Chance was quite the practical joker and loved to make people laugh. He was known as a "big prankster" to all who knew him. He was a martial arts instructor and was learning to play the guitar. He also had a '68 Chevelle that he enjoyed working on. He loved spending time with his family and friends and they will miss him so much.
Survivors: Wife, Danielle Robichaux; his father and stepmother, Johnny and Mona Robichaux; his mother and stepfather, Denise and John Love; his brother, Travis Robichaux; his maternal grandparents, Carl and Vikki Dalton; several aunts, uncles and cousins; and a host of other family members and friends.
- Location:work
- Mood: contemplative
